Living in silence between the two vocal sides of the issue; the pro-gay activists and those who have achieved change in sexual orientation, the rest of us exist quietly behind the scenes. We fight a daily war to keep our spirits up, our promiscuity down, our Bibles open and our zippers closed.

We have good days of obedient abstinence and bad days of "giving in to the urge". Sometimes, we might even wonder if we've got that backwards.

We are drawn mysteriously and powerfully to members of our own gender. Some of us are disgusted by this, a few of us have subdued the disgust, and others of us have just grown numb to the whole thing.

As a group and individually, our common vision is not, as many outsiders believe, to switch our lusts from members of the same sex to members of the opposite sex. Rather, we will consider our journey out of homosexuality to be a success if we become better, stronger Christians, grow closer in intimacy to Jesus, and make our lives a living witness to the love and power of Christ, where we are freed from the shackles of gay addictions to serve Jesus and light the world on His behalf.

Changing sexual orientation has happened for some, is happening for others, and would be a pleasant surprise for many of us. And there are others who have come to accept they have a better shot at striking crude oil in their back yard than they do at becoming hetero- sexual. This is of no importance.

What is important is what the journey out of gay living is all about. It's about never giving up the hope for change, while learning to survive in a world that does not believe in hope. It's about coming out on top in a society that is not kind to those who view the gay lifestyle as sinful. It's about equipping ourselves with insights, truths and encouragement to even out the overwhelming odds against us. It's about clinging to principle in the midst of social, spiritual, psychological and biological pressures. It's about proclaiming, by example, our belief that there is a greater purpose to recovery than becoming heterosexually active…and that is to become active for Christ. It's about working day by day to achieve a heart's vision, carved out of faith and kept alive by divine promise. It's about believers pulling together to support each other, love each other, and work toward our ultimate goal of becoming more Christ-like and less world-like.

Buggin' Out!'s commitment, and perhaps its sharpest criticism, is to talk openly about all the temptations, real-world struggles, and "dirty stuff" homosexuals must contend with. Yes, many scared and misunderstood men are trapped in gay sex theaters, many teens are secretly exposed to and addicted to gay pornography, and many married men are living double lives that are destroying them. For this reason, you will not find these unfortunate but real struggles ignored in these pages. To do so, would be to claim that Jesus is not able to offer hope in this area or that He is too pompous to care…and both these statements are Biblically and observably false.

It is my prayer that one day all who struggle against gay addictions will be able to understand thoroughly the transforming power of Jesus Christ. Not in word, not in theory, and not by observing it in others, but simply through a personal experience of liberation.

Thank you for allowing Buggin’ Out! to be part of your journey.

From Buggin’ Out ! Newsletter